Simply Being was featured on my previous blog in November 2017 and published in the 2019 edition of Holy Family University's literary magazine Folio alongside my poem Today Is A Day.
I thought it would be a good time to update my website before I give presentations to three different groups towards the end of the month. I also thought it was timely to repost this post now not only as a reminder to myself, but also because I have sort of been struggling with some of the feelings I describe in this piece a lot again. All of my siblings are now away in college, my parents and I and every other human are getting older, I recently lost my best buddy Bentley (my dog), typing is continuing to get harder, and I have been missing my friend who passed away unexpectedly in February 2016 more lately with all the changes happening around me as she seemed to magically understand all these feelings we both shared so well. But one has to find ways to try to stay present and choosing to be Simply Being helps a little and allows us to try to shift our focus.
Like every human, I am susceptible to becoming trapped in my own head and worrying incessantly.
I have been through a lot and would like to believe it has made me stronger, but some days I am just tired.
My spinal fusion saved my life, but at times I questioned whether all of the pain was worth it.
My feeding tube allows me not to be hungry and also sustain my weight, but I also have had a number of issues with that.
Some people who were in my life are no longer in it.
I worry who will help me in the future and how that will all work.
I have to strive to remember I can not change my past or my future. I only can live for now. Everyday might not be a good day, but there is something good in everyday.